The other day, I noticed that the bloke in front of me in the queue at Sainsbury's was wearing a pair of Levi's new "anti-fit" jeans. They looked utterly shit, in a myriad ways.
Now, this is interesting. (Yes, it is.) Levi's have created some new jeans which simply do not fit. Doesn't matter what size you buy or what size you are: they are such a weird shape that they are guaranteed not to fit anyone. And they don't even not fit in a cool way, like the giant trousers of ten-year old skateboarders do, because they transcend merely being too big or too small: they are both. In short, these new jeans are an example of extraordinarily bad tailoring.
Levi's are not stupid, however. They have popped adverts on to our screens in which blokes wearing jeans that don't fit pull extremely attractive women. Unsubtle, perhaps, but I'm sure it's working. After all, the poor bloke I saw wearing the bloody things the other day didn't need the help of bad trousers to appear ugly. The ads had clearly persuaded him that what he's been doing wrong all these years is wearing clothes designed to fit his body inside them, and he had leapt enthusiastically into this latest scheme to get laid, when he really should have considered a better haircut first.
Now, if Levi's marketing department were working for a company that couldn't actually make clothes, I would applaud them. These guys could sell arseless boiler-suits made of pickles to the masses. But Levi's are quite good at making jeans famed for it, in fact. Why go to all the trouble of designing crap clothes and figuring out how to sell them, when they could just continue to make clothes that fit?
Bloody hell. Does it? What, like, you sign up to the EU Constitution and you get to pull hot chicks? So how do you explain Cheri Blair?
ReplyDeleteOr do you sign up and get given badly fitting trousers to wear?
ReplyDeleteNow, that might explain Cheri Blair.
ReplyDelete