A life of lifetimes.

I mentioned recently that the modern British definition of a "life sentence" — at least seven years before parole may be considered — meant that I am more than four lifetimes old. Well, turns out I was wrong:

A man who stabbed a woman nearly 30 times has been sentenced to life in prison by a court.

Mark Antony Oldfield, 32, from Devizes, Wiltshire, knifed ex-girlfriend Hayley Cooper 28 times, near Salisbury, on 14 September last year.

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After stabbing her, he then tried to burn her, using an aerosol and a lighter, having previously head-butted her.

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The judge reduced Oldfield's minimum term from nine to six years to give credit for his guilty plea, but he will be subject to lifetime parole.

But with a discount for good behaviour and taking into consideration the 269 days he has been in custody since the attack, the court heard he could be considered for parole in just over two years.

I am sixteen lifetimes old.