Gerry Adams is right.

Not generally, of course. But he's dead right that Peter Hain is patronising — though he's wrong if he thinks that Hain is only patronising to Republicans. He's patronising to Republicans, Unionists, Tories, the Labour Party, police officers, small children, passing cars, corpses, mythical creatures, and, I have little doubt, himself. He is simply unable to talk in any manner other than that of a second-rate primary-school teacher addressing the most stupid pupil he has ever dealt with. Only he's more patronising than that.

I am immensely proud (by association — it's not like I've done anything) that an acquaintance of mine who shall remain nameless had a blazing stand-up row with Mr Hain, lambasting him face-to-face for his very public and damaging stupidity. If only everyone did that.

And now, apparently, the smug git is the front-runner to be our next Deputy Prime Minister. Labour MPs, it would seem, like being patronised.

It is important, of course, not to let Peter Hain's smug condescension misdirect your attention from his essential nastiness. It never ceases to amaze me that anyone has ever voted for him. But, of course, those who voted for him did so safe in the knowledge that they are not those over whom he wields power. Hmm... on second thoughts, maybe he should be made Deputy PM.