Saturday 3 September 2005

Tim Dorsey.

One of the last things I managed to buy before I ran out of money was the new Tim Dorsey novel, Torpedo Juice. As expected, it's class.

I keep recommending Tim Dorsey, but that's hardly much to go on, really, is it? So here are some quotes to give you waverers a flavour.

The opening:

Howdy. I'm your narrator.
    In literary classes, I'm what's referred to as the "omniscient narrator." Yeah, right. Truth is, I've been drinking.

At a meeting for people with OCD:

And more ridiculous stories. Have to keep dusting the house. Have to keep making sure the doors are locked. One person couldn't stop washing his hands, one dreaded contact with faucets, and another had both problems and just stood at sinks a long time.

In the next room:

The Lower Keys Chapter of People Susceptible to Joining Cults. The members attended religiously. The moderator was trying to get them to stop coming.

On relationships:

But I've just figured out the first thing. "Nothing" really means "something." If it actually is nothing, they'll tell you all about it, just yap and yap and yap about the most meaningless tripe while you're trying to watch a documentary on Czar Nicholas, and finally I say — real nice — "Baby, I've kind of been looking forward to this show all week...." So now all of sudden Czar Nicholas is more important than she is. Like a stupid idiot, I had to say he was — you know, Russia, dynasty, big turning point in global history.

If you've not read any of Dorsey's books yet, best start with Florida Roadkill.

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